Wednesday, May 4, 2016

Finding My Feet Again

Sometimes our best laid plans just don't make it.

That is how I sum up this year so far.
Empty nest. Wacky weather. Travel. Floods. Computer virus and one crashed. Full time job. Full time homestead.
I keep thinking, one of these days I am going to get it figured out.
That day hasn't arrived yet- but I'm working on it.

Right now- one computer is functional. The rain has stopped. Water has receded. Job is moving along at a varied pace. I am still alive and in the upright position.

Until you homestead without your children, you never really realize how much they did. It never occurred to me how well delegated responsibilities were until I stood at the feed storage area and saw empty bins! Who normally handles that? The past four months have been a crazy roller coaster of sink or swim- in which there were days I am pretty sure I drowned. Time to get it together! After all, my children would be ashamed of me making such a failure of this life we built together.

Today- I find my feet.
Plans are drawn and laid out- revisions and changes are on the horizon in an effort to streamline and conquer. The problem, I realize, is that I kept trying to do things the way we were doing them together...but we are not together! Time to take ownership of the mess and make it work for me. Once a week I will assess those feed storage bins and actually not run out!
There will still be gardens, and chickens, goats and a fussy donkey.
I will find the floor of the quilting room and once again let my creative juices out of their box.
Miss K and I will paint and plan and play.
My short arms and stubby legs will manage to start and work the push mower.
Meals will be made *I had no idea how hard it was to cook for one (my husband and I work different shifts).

As I find my footing, I tip my hat to all you wonderful farm girls out there who do this day in and day out.. alone.. with outside jobs... with that empty nest. You ladies rock!
May I learn from you!!!

Some how, some way this is all going to be okay.

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