Sometimes such realizations hit you..they're growing up. All in their teen years (well, youngest is 13 this fall) and starting to stand alone - go on without me - find their path. There is joy in this, yes, to see them be responsible, dependable, diligent, faithful...and make a stand for right. There is also sadness,,,they need their space - they must make decisions on their own - they must sometimes fall (with out mama to catch them) - they must do their own things. Some days, the reality that they are growing up just hits you hard.
As mentioned, our oldest is at the rodeo this weekend (without us)- with Leap of Faith - being a leader to others. She is stretching her wings, setting her schedules, planning her calendar...sometimes paying her way. At her age, my job is more overseer and guide (sometimes intervention is required, but then sometimes best to let things run a course) for at this age some lessons must be learned by mistakes. I do not deny it is hard to accept this stage - especially when they are away from us, stretching wings, being independent.
Simplyjen is starting to spend one day a week apprenticing with master gardeners - learning - growing - stretching a little. Another one inching closer to her independence...needing to be guided instead of lead. She is growing up. Often, she is planning her own routines, handling her own schedule, needing less direction.
Farmboy, poor thing, is here more than any (because hunting season is over!). Being a boy, he is less needy of leading that the girls were at this age. Already, he is stretching toward the role of leader, protector, provider... watching over us gals, fixing things, doing "man's work" around us. He more often is seen following his dad around - tools in hand, carrying the heavy things, learning to repair, build, care for .... learning to grow up.
So what is this farm mama to do? Treasure the moments together - now - when we are all together - gathered round the table, the fireplace, the barn stall...soak up our time. She is to let them grow...to pray for them..to accept God has a beautiful plan for them....to watch them bloom and be ready when they need guidance, a listening ear, a word of wisdom -- or a story from experience. It is not easy...God hears my prayers - throughout the day-- pleading for His help in this new direction. She is to share her heart with her husband - remembering, he sees them growing too.
.....Occasionally, we must savor the moment when they realize ---they still need us--for now--- to be mom and dad and show them the way.