Thursday, September 11, 2014

Something's Gotta Give

      Exhausted. Dumbfounded. Frustrated. I sit here tonight utterly lost in the cosmic nonsense. Issues that have been pushed back and tucked away but never fully addressed have shoved themselves front and center, boiling over like a cauldron. Something has to give. Where is the revelation, the flaming arrow, when you need it? Some things seem so clear as if where I am is exactly where I am meant to be, yet there are other things that just can't seem to find resolve.
relationships that just don't work
personalities that grate
projects I cannot complete
broken habits
sleep I can't find
time that just doesn't exist
         No great words of wisdom have been found. Comfort hasn't come. Some stresses just don't have
relief. 
I love my family
my job
the little munchkins that cross my path
the idea of 'better'
the fantasy of problems solved
and rest
Tomorrow is a new day- and it has great things promised for it, yet in the corner of my eye the reality of unresolved issues looms. Is what I do worth it? What is it that will give?

4 comments:

Lisa Coon said...

Recently, I had to deal with all my dad's stuff before and after he died and the dealing with "stuff" just kind of got to me. I feel like all I do is manipulate stuff. We have too much of it. I don't have enough time in my day to do everything that needs to be done-aside from my full time job, I have a kid to deal with, a house, two dogs, a fish, a yard, a husband and a garden. In a step to remedy this, I've started to get rid of "stuff." My husband, in theory, agrees, but sometimes he balks at the stuff I'm getting rid of. I'm focusing on 'my' stuff right now to avoid that conflict. I've only just started and I'm already feeling tons better. One of the things I'm planning on giving up is the community garden. I just don't have the time to devote to it and the lip service the husband pays to 'helping' is really all talk. It's all me and I'm doing this for me. I won't die if I don't have all these things and they'll save me time in the long run. So, "stuff" is my something that has to give.

Good luck in your quest.

Joyce said...

Thank you dear unseen friend. That is exactly what I am trying to do. I have a very hard time of letting go of "stuff". I will continue plodding though. I don't want our daughter to have to deal with this stuff/junk after I am gone. :-)

Lisa Coon said...

Take baby steps. I'm sure there are things that you know you can part with-clothes for example. Shoes that you haven't worn in a while or that really just don't rock your world. Or you can even box stuff up and put in the garage and then after a month or two or three, get rid of the box since you haven't really needed it in that time. Do it for you.

It's probably going to take me several passes, especially books and particularly cookbooks. I have two full shelves of them. Do I use them all? No. But I'm having a hard time parting with them.

Simply Scaife Family said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you- each of you. It is such a relief to know the 'something's has to give' happens to more people than just me. Like each of you, it is time for me to deal with some 'stuff' and hopefully figure out where the stuff goes- and what to do with the stuff that stays. Family support is often difficult to find; I think sometimes they just don't know what to do either so doing nothing is their way. One pile at a time is my current approach!